Causes of procrastination

Sometimes it’s difficult to start large tasks

Think of all the times you have found excuses, justified something or were able to blame other people or circumstances for your inactivity. Unfortunately the required or desired tasks rarely go away and this just makes the situation worse. The last person we blame is usually ourselves. Do you want to be good at making excuses or good at getting results?

If we recognise the causes of procrastination then we have the opportunity to do something about it. Over the next two posts I will list the top ten reasons that I believe perpetuate inaction. The first five focus on the issues that may involve external influences and the second are more internal.  See if any of the following ring true with you.

Priorities. People who cannot sort out tasks and assign priorities to them often jump from task to task with little or no understanding of where they wish to end up. These people find it difficult to know what’s important, so they have a go at everything and end up with too much to do, and then continue to put it off.

Risk. People who are afraid to take risks procrastinate to protect themselves from the consequences of their actions. The risk of failing and destroying their dream, the risk of success which may force other changes in their lives or the risk of having to perform, such as getting a promotion and then not knowing what to do. Much of this is about staying in the comfort zone.

Dependence. Some people are unwilling to do things for themselves and don’t wish to be in a position where they’re responsible for their actions or results. These people depend on others to tell them, show them or help them with what is required in life. They will postpone significant tasks until there is someone to help them or do it for them. And of course if they fail they always have someone else to blame.

Responsibility. Some people will do just about anything to avoid responsibility. They will procrastinate and rationalise the delays by blaming others or making statements such as ‘this isn’t my responsibility’ or ‘this isn’t part of my job’. They have to be accountable for their actions and don’t want to expose themselves to the consequences of being wrong. So they do nothing.

Peer pressure. People who fear the opinion of others often procrastinate in order to avoid criticism or even approval. This often happens when the person wants to step outside the norm and create something different for themselves. The jealousies and inadequacies of others often push you to stick to the same path as everyone else. Everyone is safe in the middle of the herd.

Why we put things off

Why don’t we?

This post, the next in the series on beating procrastination, explores why we put things off when we know we shouldn’t.

It’s easy to postpone the things you should be doing and fill your time with easier and less important activities. And it’s often a difficult task that you know is there but can’t quite get to it.

Procrastination causes stress – it’s that line on your to do list that never gets crossed. It nags away at you causing tension, anxiety and fatigue. It can also keep you from reaching your goals, the ones you say you’d do anything to achieve. It stifles personal growth and can keep you from living a happy, healthy and prosperous life.

So why do we do it? There are lots of reasons. You can be afraid of failure or success, feel insecure, feel unable to cope with things that are difficult or simply be put off by effort and concentration that you can’t or won’t apply now.  Sometimes the dream is better than the reality, and if you never try you can’t fail.

When it comes down to it, there is a cost for everything; time to write a book, application to gain a qualification, pain and exertion to lose weight and money to start investing. Often the cost of doing something is perceived to be higher than the benefit. I really want to lose weight but I just love food so much and I’m too tired to exercise. Then sometimes the rules of the game change. You have a mild heart attack and suddenly eating those foods and not exercising has a much higher cost.

Then the benefit, living, is more important than the cost and you find the time to make the changes in your life. Deadlines can do the same thing. You can put things off until the price of not doing it – failing or being reprimanded – is higher than the pain of doing it – so it gets done at the last possible moment. Unfortunately that is rarely a recipe for the best possible outcome.

Clearing your inbox of 30 urgent but not important messages may provide a sense of satisfaction but it doesn’t achieve anything meaningful. Tackling the difficult task is more difficult, requires sustained activity and has consequences if not done properly. So we stick to the easy, the quick and the unimportant in the illusion of productivity.

But no one thanks you for that. And you aren’t getting closer to achieving your goals. So you’re stuck in a rut feeling bad about yourself. What’s your priority for the rest of today? Will you waste the day on irrelevancies?

Are you a procrastinator?

Think big, start small

Do you procrastinate?

Don’t worry, it’s not like admitting some dirty little secret – but it is recognising the reality and demands of modern life.

Most of us procrastinate from time to time but we don’t want to make it a habit; we want to be more effective and find it frustrating when we’re not.  Often the reasons for our procrastination are pushed into the background mayhem, leaving us feeling less than fulfilled.

Admitting that you procrastinate is the first step to being more productive, and you could end up making some significant positive changes in your life. Procrastination isn’t laziness, although if you’re lazy this certainly won’t help, and it doesn’t mean doing something the second you think of it. We all have to prioritise and it makes sense to let an idea develop before launching headlong into a new project.

We all know people who get so excited about their latest idea that they drop everything and jump right in. These people tend to have several projects ‘on the go’ and rarely finish anything before chasing the next big thing (their next sure fire plan to instant success and fortune). They get an ‘A+’ for excitement and enthusiasm but an ‘F’ for follow-through.

Yet they also jump to the next thing while procrastinating on the first thing they started. Or sometimes the idea is there but the action isn’t. The four Ps – Preparation, purpose, planning and persistence – will beat procrastination.

We need to find a middle ground, where ideas, effort and execution come together in a meaningful way. There’s a great prize for those that find it. The hardest part is starting, and by reading this post you have started!  In the next post we’ll look why we procrastinate at all.

Beating procrastination

No time like the present

I’ve been meaning to write a post on procrastination for a while but I just haven’t got around to it. I’ve procrastinated as much as anyone and knowing I’m doing it is very frustrating. It’s easy to fill your time with useless activity achieving very little. I’ve let a lot of life go by unattended.

Then there are times when I’ve felt unstoppable and got so much done. So I learnt how to get things done when I had to. And I remembered what I’d learned. So each time I have to complete an important task I know what I need to do.

Still, sometimes I feel the pull to waste time and do a succession of easier but less important tasks. It comes down to accepting what needs to be done, focusing on the important over the urgent and resisting the urge to check email and phone messages.

Sometimes the most important thing you can do is be with your family, free of invasive distractions. At other times it’s the important tasks at work or that personal project that demand your attention. The trick is to know when to focus on each.

How big are your goals?

Are your goals big enough?

We’re frequently reminded that we must set goals. Have you ever considered why? It’s fine to begin with the end in mind and understand that we require a clear destination, but what is the deeper purpose, the one that provide the impetus for action? And how high should we aim? To the stars and hit the moon, or something a bit closer to earth?

Let’s make sense of goal setting.  A goal:

-           Stimulates excitement, energy and effort.

-           Creates focus, motivation, momentum and purpose.

-           Builds anticipation of a future positive state.

-           Drives action to take you there.

Having a definite major purpose is satisfying, even before you’ve taken action, because it makes the journey as good as the destination. And the result is personal growth.

Committing to a goal helps find the courage to stretch and take calculated risks outside your comfort zone and to overcome the fear of failure. It creates a life of its own where, ideally, the outcome is never in doubt. You keep going until you get there. Starting is often the most difficult.

The scope of your goal must be reasonable and attainable. Setting impossible goals sets you up for failure and makes committing almost impossible. If you don’t believe it, how can you achieve it?

You can break down larger goals into smaller steps, treating each as a milestone. Then want each step enough to create emotional energy. Losing weight, gaining a promotion, winning at sport, finding the perfect partner, starting a charity; what are the first steps you can take today?

So how high should you aim? The answer is higher than you usually do and high enough to stimulate your imagination and innovation. Be clear on what you want and decide that you will achieve it. The removal of indecision and doubt sets your course and creates energy to get you there.

A new life – what a rush!

A wonderful new life

It has been a few weeks since my last post; it has been a very busy and exciting time. We have a new addition to the family and I’ve just returned from a business trip in Europe. This is a rather lengthy and self indulgent post so I hope you enjoy it!

—

The first time I heard I was to be a grandfather was after returning from a holiday with my wife in Hawaii. On our return, Joanne and I were told by our daughter Holly that we ‘need to talk’. No, not now, later this afternoon at the café at our local shopping centre. ‘Is everything all right?’ Asking that question filled me with dread.

‘What could it be?’, I asked my wife.

Tom is coming as well so has something bad happened; are they moving out, is she pregnant or does she have a brain tumour? How can I possibly wait six hours to hear the news from this child that means the world to me?

–

‘Mum and Dad, I’m pregnant.’

So that’s it, she’s 20 years old and pregnant. Whoa, that means I will be a grandfather and I’m only 48: hang on, this time it’s not about me.

‘Are you happy about it, Holly?’

‘Ecstatic.’

‘Great then, we’re going to have a baby!’

–

Only days before in Hawaii we’d discussed how this was the first holiday in 20 years that we didn’t have to worry about the kids. I’d made a passing comment that we should enjoy this intermission; in five or six years we could be grandparents! It was funny then.

I was happy for my daughter; especially because she has a medical problem that may have prevented her having children. My little girl is pregnant. My baby is having a baby. The realisation of how our lives were about to change washed over me. I hadn’t seen this one coming.

A burning bud of white light ignited in me and began to grow. My initial shock abated and I felt a glow of anticipation. A new life, another generation and I’m young enough to enjoy it! Instantly I saw the world through different eyes; I need to make it a better place, I have a responsibility to this child and nothing will get in my way. I was moving up a notch in the life cycle; I was as nervous as I was excited.

Over the coming weeks, as my daughter’s belly grew, I watched her, sitting back, observing and taking it in. We were so excited.  We found out it was going to be a boy and the first time I felt him move I was in awe. I became impatient – when is he going to get here?

My wife and daughter became closer, her pregnancy strengthening their mother–daughter bond. In many ways Holly appeared to me more childlike: her look of wonder, the uncertainty in her childlike voice on the phone. Can she really be having a baby?

I felt privileged to take this journey with her, to be present for the first ultrasound and take her to obstetrician appointments when Tom was working. We laughed at the disapproving stares of people who thought I was her partner and she would say ‘Come on, dad’ to set the record straight. We sat in the hospital café after each appointment and talked excitedly about the meaning of life and our front row seats at this master performance.

As young parents, they will live with us for a year or so until they can get into their own home. I already know I won’t want them to go; being packed to the rafters is fine by us. With our other two children and my mother in law all living under the one roof I may be forced to take to the caravan for a brief respite – just me and the spiders.

Joanne and I had often talked about another baby; we thought there was another little boy destined to come to us. Now he has; he has just found a different path to get here.

–

I received the call from Holly at work last Friday afternoon.

‘My water has broken. What should I do?’

Hastily cancelling my appointments, I was on the way home in minutes.

‘Don’t freak out’, I told myself, it’ll be OK.

We arrived at the hospital but the baby wasn’t quite ready to come just yet. We went home with instructions to come back in the morning.

Dad-to-be Tom and I had a couple of drinks in contemplation of what was to come.

‘Not too many mate’, I said. ‘We could be on the way anytime.’

Two hours later, after an hour of sleep, we were. Bubs was coming, and keen to see the world.

The delivery suite was nice. Large enough for the four of us and we made Holly as comfortable as we could. The nurses were great at keeping us informed and her doctor updated – unfortunately for him it was 2.00am Saturday!

Three hours and several coffees (for me) later it was show time and I was asked to leave. Holly wanted her mum in the room along with Tom.

I was told to sit in the waiting room but lasted only minutes before returning to hover outside the delivery suite. Throwing enquiring looks to the parade of nursing staff coming in and out, I was reassured that everything was going along nicely. I wasn’t this anxious when my own children were born!

I could hear my daughter’s pain. Not a cry or a shout, more of a whimper tempered in fear and uncertainty; it ripped through me and it took all of my restraint not to run into the room to hold her. I paced up and down like an expectant father from a 60’s sitcom.

I watched the clock and the minutes painfully ticked by, the world reduced to a singularity residing behind that whitewashed door. On his last pass the doctor said ’30 minutes to go’ and as that time approached I strained my ears. Time slowed, the world turned to molasses, I could hear my heart beating and finally I heard him cry; a beautiful sound: welcome to the world little guy.

In a few minutes I was allowed in to see this amazing little person and my exhausted daughter. She had done so very, very well.

–

Now my little grandson is here and I marvel at his perfection.

I loved my grandson from the moment I heard his first cry and I’m very proud of the mother and woman my daughter has become. What a wonderful world.

Live long and prosper

How much time do you have?

After an excellent 2011, I’m again thinking about losing those extra kilos and getting fit.

I was so good last year, but let it slide over Christmas and haven’t regained my mojo. Disappointing, I hate going backwards in anything. Finding excuses is easy, finding motivation is somewhat harder. It used to be about vanity, now it’s longevity.

I recently read that the average life expectancy is 81 years; 79 years for men and 84 for women. That got me thinking. That’s around 29,000 days.

I’m 48, so I have spent more than 17,500 of those, or 60%.

I’ve experienced 17,500 unique days, had the opportunity to make a difference to my life and others, to experience happiness and to waste more time than I’d care to account.

Now I have 11,500 more opportunities to live in the moment, take responsibility, create significance, leave a legacy and grow.  I can slow the pace of life to enjoy my family and find peace.

Importantly, I have 11,500 chances to start over. But no one can guarantee me those 11,500 days. I could get more. But I know too many people who’ve had less. So I can’t wait.

So I will start with today.

Your place in your personal space

Respect the personal space!

Understanding what drives you helps to control your activity and time. It also provides you with a compass. This leads to personal freedom.

The single greatest obstacle to success is time. Mostly this is the time used to do all those things you are ‘supposed’ to do. Life can become a monolithically repetitive chore, which runs on auto pilot with little resistance original thought. Think of your standard day and notice how many things are pre-programmed and how many of these are a waste of time.

Understand what influences you and you will:

• Learn how to keep focused on your own plans
• Avoid diversions which drain your resources
• Focus on the variables you can control.

So, become aware of the internal and external constraints that limit you. Apply knowledge gained from past experiences to present ones. Know yourself: when you are most creative, the people who inspire you, what makes you happy. And then become familiar with the opposite. To be comfortable with situations that are unpleasant provides benefit in equal proportions.

We’re often told to look inward but we must look out as well. We can’t avoid external influences, and many are beyond our control. We must operate in the world so we must balance both. Knowledge is power, which helps us deal with what life presents. The benefit? When we rely on our experience, rather than our autopilot, to deal with new situations we reduce anxiety and increase our flexibility to handle what comes our way.

This is part experience, part confidence but … mostly … responsibility for your own behaviour and outcomes. Freedom comes from knowing your needs, your effect on others and their effect on you. The better you understand, the easier it will be to focus your efforts on achieving success.

 

Where are you going?

Where will your journey take you?

Our pursuit of success is as much about significance as it is money, power or security.

To achieve success, we need to apply our talents and intellect to purposeful, goal-oriented actions.

Of course, you must know what that looks like if you plan to find it. Understanding what your success looks like and where you will find it has been the subject of earlier posts. In this post, we’re going to look at the ‘how’ of success.

The ‘who’ of success is you. The ‘what’ of success is how you define it. The ‘where’ of success is focusing your energies on the right elements of your life. The ‘when’ of success is always now. And, finally, the ‘why’ of success is when you’re ready to do what it takes to get what you want.

And that brings us to the ‘how’.

Many self-help books explain the who, what, where, when and why. Few explain the ‘how’.

The significance of developing action-oriented strategies for moving toward your goals rests on the realisation that life isn’t static. You don’t reach a point of enlightenment from which life progresses in a perfect flow.

If you seek perfection then you will be disappointed. Life doesn’t work that way. Short of renouncing the material world and meditating in a cave for the next 30 years, life will find you and events will overtake you!

Developing strategies to meet them means accepting change, and the realisation that your strategy must be fluid to adapt to changing circumstances. In any smooth water there are occasional ripples and it takes skill to negotiate these. When you are powering along, ripples soon give way to smooth water again.

You may wish to avoid change, maintain the status quo and ensure certainty. This ignores the inevitability of change and limits your ability to adapt. We say we wish to change … we often even say we must … but still we remain stationary as the world revolves around us.

Accept uncertainty. Look for positive change. Keep moving towards worthwhile goals. These are the action strategies that mark you as successful. That is the path to significance.

Every moment contains new possibilities. The choice is yours.

What do you have time for?

Time to listen?

A man entered the metro station in Washington DC one cold January morning in 2007 and started playing the violin. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time more than two thousand people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.

Three minutes went by and a middle-aged man noticed there was musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried up to meet his schedule.

A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip: a woman threw the money in the case and continued to walk.

A few minutes later a man leaned against the wall to listen, but soon looked at his watch and left.

The one who paid the most attention was a three-year-old boy. His mother hurried him along. Several other children also stopped to listen, but all the parents hurriedly moved them on.

In 45 minutes, only six people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave the musician money but continued to walk their normal pace. The man collected $32. When he finished playing and silence took over, no one applauded. The only person that spoke to him had recognised him.

The violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the top musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth 3.5 million dollars handcrafted by Antonio Stradivari in 1713.

Two days before playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theatre in Boston, with ticket price of $100.

This is a real story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organised by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and priorities.

In a common environment at an inappropriate hour:

Do we perceive beauty?

Do we stop to appreciate it?

Do we recognise the talent in an unexpected context?

Here’s the point: If we don’t have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world playing some of the best music ever written, how many other things are we missing?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnOPu0_YWhw